yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i just had sex bonerless
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Randomize
