I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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