omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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