I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
