she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
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I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
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The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
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