I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
