We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
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