We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
