Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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