Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Randomize
