Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
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