I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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