quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
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