# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
