He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
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