What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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