Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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