About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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