Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
