everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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