New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
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