About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
and she was petting her beer can
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
