no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
