I cockslap morals
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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