spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
