Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Randomize