so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
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