I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize