So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
