my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
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