It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
