hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
if only i could text you this smell
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Enjoy the penises
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Randomize
