Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i now understand why vodka
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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