garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I got inside last night via doggy door
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
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