at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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