Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
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