This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
