Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
