Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize