so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Randomize