She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Randomize
