By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
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But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
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It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
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