AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
You're a waste of cheezeits
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
