i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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