Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
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At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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