ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize