suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
