I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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