Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
