Texts From Last Night

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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast

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  (615): Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast http://tfl.nu/lexd
  Replies (12) Good night (604) Bad night (1882) Order T-Shirt
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  (214): View more from Texas

  i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"

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  (214): i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat" http://tfl.nu/yhqk
  Replies (30) Good night (4789) Bad night (798) Order T-Shirt
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents

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  (843): I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents http://tfl.nu/wxlb
  Replies (46) Good night (8800) Bad night (825) Order T-Shirt
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  (305): View more from Florida

  We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.

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  (305): We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had. http://tfl.nu/tauu
  Replies (26) Good night (5512) Bad night (770) Order T-Shirt
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..

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  (847): boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this.. http://tfl.nu/2izx
  Replies (8) Good night (2795) Bad night (614) Order T-Shirt
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  (518): View more from New York

  Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?

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  (518): Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation? http://tfl.nu/dtaz
  Replies (11) Good night (2117) Bad night (2318) Order T-Shirt
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.

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  (256): Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO. http://tfl.nu/k62i
  Replies (8) Good night (3322) Bad night (714) Order T-Shirt
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come

  (804): View more from Virginia

  and you stopped teaching...why?

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  (724): You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come (804): and you stopped teaching...why? http://tfl.nu/8fjo
  Replies (5) Good night (1999) Bad night (579)
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  (906): View more from Michigan

  Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.

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  (906): Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think. http://tfl.nu/xmje
  Replies (7) Good night (1228) Bad night (735) Order T-Shirt
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  (567): View more from Ohio

  Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.

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  (567): Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho. http://tfl.nu/6eue
  Replies (2) Good night (1510) Bad night (431) Order T-Shirt
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse

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  (602): hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse http://tfl.nu/qtc9
  Replies (7) Good night (2079) Bad night (426) Order T-Shirt
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area

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  (508): Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area http://tfl.nu/7yxw
  Replies (3) Good night (992) Bad night (283) Order T-Shirt
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  (760): View more from California

  I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?

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  (760): I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts? http://tfl.nu/drjd
  Replies (6) Good night (964) Bad night (440) Order T-Shirt
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks

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  (603): Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks http://tfl.nu/ddr9
  Replies (8) Good night (263) Bad night (492)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.

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  (724): I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower. http://tfl.nu/44q1
  Replies (2) Good night (433) Bad night (168) Order T-Shirt

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