I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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